Hot on the heels of the revelation that the world’s first iPod-style device was in fact invented by John Lennon in the 70s, O! News has discovered this advert which clearly shows that the current iPod ads are heavily influenced by the ones for the Beatlebox. Bad Apple!

Lyris has discovered this little gem:

Like Space Channel 5, “A Thousand Clarinets” features a TV reporter girl who (as far as I gather) is looking for her big break. In both films, the TV station is hijacked by the heroes because there’s a big event worthy of media coverage that only they can give - in Space Channel 5, it’s everyone being hypnotised, in Clarinets, it’s much funnier: all the weapons in an army base magically turn into musical instruments. The reporter rushes to the scene for her chance of stardom. Both girls use music to defeat an evil of some sort, and in both the film and the game, the bad guys cut the power near the end to try and sabotage the big musical jambooree - which of course goes ahead against all odds regardless.

Now, I don’t know about you but the first question that springs to my mind is: “What’s the Czech for ‘left right left right SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT’?”

Yes, you heard me: George Lucas hates you, and everything you stand for. The Digital Bits had this to report about the forthcoming DVD releases of the original Star Wars films in their virgin, untouched form:

The original theatrical versions of the films are going to be non-anamorphic […] What this likely means is that Lucasfilm has simply re-purposed the non-anamorphic transfers that were done for previous laserdisc and VHS releases of the “original” versions of the films […] [W]hat we’re going to get instead is little better than a ported-over laserdisc.

The site later posted this:

The strange thing is, Lucas himself doesn’t seem to think the fans are even interested in the original theatrical versions of the films on DVD. Witness his comments in this recent interview at MTV.com: “It’s just the original versions, as they were,” Lucas said. “We didn’t do anything to it at all. But we’re not sure how many people want that.” That’s just an insane thing to say given how many Most Wanted DVD lists the original Star Wars films top around the Net, and the folks at Lucasfilm have to know it. So here’s an unsettling thought… Lucas finally agrees to include the original versions on the new DVDs, but he won’t pony up for new transfers. Do you suppose there’s a deliberate reason for that? If people don’t buy them because of the lack of quality, Lucas can simply say, “See? People didn’t buy them. They don’t want ‘em.” And if they do buy them, but in a year or two start asking for better quality, Lucas can say, “Gimme a break. I already gave them to you on DVD. Now quit bugging me about it.” D’oh!

Surely this can be the only rational explanation for such a sub-standard release; I imagine there’ll be a lot of people turning to the various bootleg laserdisc ports seeing as how many of them offer such extras as spliced-together commentaries and isolated scores. It’s also worth pointing out that all the original Star Wars films were also released with 6-channel audio mixes so the fact that these DVDs will just have a bog-standard 2-channel stereo track is another poke in the eye from Lucas.

So there you have it; conclusive proof that George Lucas hates us all, otherwise surely he’d see to it that the public gets what the public wants? Most of all, though, I think he has a large reserve of hate for Han Solo; perhaps he’s threatened by his thrusting masculinity and his ability to measure time in parsecs (which is actually a unit of distance, and therefore the space equivalent of saying “I only wanted some bread and milk from Sainsburys but the traffic was so bad it took me 35 miles to get back and I ended up missing the end of Coronation Street by a few inches”). Why else would he emasculate the poor rogue by having him shoot second?

Unless, of course, he’s actually making sly references to Solo’s virility by showing that he never shoots first…

Yeah, okay, so I didn’t post yesterday. To make it up to you, allow me to draw your attention to an inspiring tale of triumph against the odds concerning one man’s heroic efforts to bring Joking Apart, a relatively little-known British sitcom, to DVD.

If you’re too lazy to read that article (and I really do urge you to do so), then I can summarise it as follows: man likes sitcom, man wants to see sitcom on DVD, man licenses sitcom himself, man authors DVD himself, man sells DVD to public, everybody wins.

For some reason, what that amazes me the most about the whole thing isn’t the fact that somebody with no previous DVD production experience was able to talk the license-holders into allowing him to produce the disc, nor is it that one man working on his own was responsible for everything (apart from the actual manufacturing of the discs); no, it’s the fact that the DVD has a subtitle track and decent-quality extras: a 20-minute retrospective featurette and commentaries on four of the episodes from most of the main cast and the series’ creator, Steven Moffat (who also created Press Gang and Coupling, and whose most recent work was writing some of the best-received episodes of the 2005/06 series of Doctor Who, namely The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances and The Girl in the Fireplace). Why are these so amazing? Because even “proper” commercial DVDs don’t always have them, ostensibly for cost issues, and yet one man (albeit one with fairly deep pockets, one assumes) was able to do these — of course, it helps that Moffat was willing to participate for free but even so, there’s studio time to book, other participants to pay, and so on.

I’ve never seen Joking Apart (hence the fact that I wasn’t able to use an apposite quote from it for the post title and had to settle on one from a different sitcom instead) but I think I’m going to give it a go; not just because of its creator’s CV but also because there’s always the chance that one of my favourite series might receive the same treatment in future.

So, if ever subtitles need doing on the no-doubt forthcoming Captain Butler DVD, give me a shout!

Matt Brett sums up why Sony are finally going to get what’s been coming to them for years, ever since they savagely and remorselessly turned Sega’s dreams into ashes and bones (did I mention I’m a bitter Dreamcast fanboy?).

I know I’m not the only one to feel this way, either; as UK Resistance put it:

People (ALL the people) were poking fun at PS3, openly mocking it’s shite games and idiotic management suits who are blind to the truth. The games are all dull sequels, as with PSP. It’s so going to be a disaster and we’ll be there to spunk on Sony’s gravestone when the bailiffs padlock the doors.

I’ll leave you with that mental image.

Where are Team GFY when you need them? Indescribable sexual tension is simmering in the blogosphere and things could get pretty tempestuous without the intervention of the Go Flocksters. Quick, somebody say something snarky!

Woah, woah, woah, wait up a second; I’ve just had a quick link-check to make sure everything’s in order and, after an interminable amount of time stuck at number two in a ten-to-one countdown, it looks like Go Flock Yourself has finally given up the ghost. It’s a sad day for the web, as Hype2.0 and Hysteria2.0 will continue unabated unless somebody steps in and continues GFY’s endlessly-cynical work of puncturing the rampant egos of the blogosphere. So far I’ve only seen former Team GFY member Christian Montoya preparing to carry their legacy forwards in his Flock It! category (announced here). He can’t be the only one, surely? Come on, good people; the internet needs you!

If the sight of the forthcoming Super Smash Bros. Brawl on the Nintendo Revolution Wii doesn’t gladden your heart then you officially have no soul. Go on, piss off and play your mediocre EA Sports games on your mediocre PS3; you deserve each other.

(Via Christian Montoya)

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Yes, that’s what you get when you fall asleep on your keyboard. Ever since Monday night I’ve felt really tired and lethargic, and everything has become a chore — including tossr, I’m afraid to say. Sorry, but that’s the way it is.

Therefore, this is a really short post to effectively say I won’t be posting properly tonight — you’ll just have to go and do something less boring instead. For example, why not watch the new episode of Consolevania? I haven’t watched it yet but I’m sure it’s very good.

Until tomorrow, then.

Ever wondered what the Pixies’ Wave of Mutilation would sound like if the Bee Gees covered it? No, me neither. Nor have I ever contemplated the thought of Prince, Tina Turner or Jimi Hendrix recording their own Pixies covers. It’s one of those things you just don’t think about.

Well, unless you’re the mysterious “Matthew”, in which case not only do you think about it, you sit down and record your own soundalike tribute to the Boston band.

By “soundalike tribute” I mean a tribute that sounds like other people, of course, as opposed to a tribute that sounds like the Pixies themselves; for that, we have to turn to Chris Morris, who in 1992 recorded a near-flawless Pixies pastiche called Motherbanger which was given away free with the late, lamented music magazine Select (and incidentally, I found the previous Pixies covers website at the blog of ex-Select scribe Graham Linehan — see, this is all connected; I’m not just blundering from one topic to another). The song (which pretty much nails the Pixies’ sound) identifies and lovingly parodies a multitude of the themes that recurred within their music, touching on Oedipal sex, Spanish lyrics and the quiet/loud dichotomy. You can thank TJ and Darrell from the internet’s premier Chris Morris-hating Chris Morris fansite, Cook’d and Bomb’d for the MP3 capture (which is of a much nicer quality than the one that’s circulated in the past).

There’s also Liam Lynch’s Fake Pixies Song (aka Colleen) which comes pretty close but — to my ears at least — doesn’t quite get the Pixies sound right in the same way as Motherbanger. Then again, Morris is no stranger to the soundalike song and his previous work is littered with them, although sadly in recent years he’s gone from well-observed parodies of mainstream acts to well-observed parodies of realtively obscure ones — not that there’s anything intrinsically less funny about doing so, but if you don’t know exactly who’s being parodied then you’re laughing at an archetype rather than the actual band, which renders the satire somewhat toothless.

Anyway, enjoy the music.

It’s true: the erstwhile Beatle did indeed pioneer portable music. As ever, O! News has the scoop.