I think I’m slowly becoming obsessed with… I don’t know, what’s the word? “Eau de toilette” sounds too poncy, “EDT” sounds like something that requires a discreet visitor the doctor, “fragrance” sounds like I’m talking about air fresheners, “frag” just sounds like I’ve been playing too much Quake, and “perfume” is just… no, no way. It’s the wrong word — no question about it. For the moment I’ll go with “fragrance”, as that’s the lesser of the evils.

Start again.

I think I’m slowly becoming obsessed with fragrances. From about the age of 15 onwards I was happy with one bottle of aftershave at a time, starting with Daniel Hechter Caractère, then moving on to Joop! Nightflight and Hugo Boss Hugo. However it was strictly used for when I was going out drinking; for day-to-day use I, like every other teenage boy in Britain, relied on a can of Lynx (I don’t remember the name of the one I had; the symbol on the front was orange and blue, if that helps narrow it down any).

And that was pretty much it as far as fragrances went; it wasn’t until mid-2003 that I started wearing something every day. To begin with I just splashed on some Body Shop No Debate that I’d once received as a present, but then I moved on to picking up cheap bottles of their Arber and Kistna scents off eBay (actually, “scents” isn’t a bad word to use either; I’ll alternate between that and “fragrances” I think). Those two are wonderful, in my opinion; I’m not much of an expert when it comes to basenote-this and topnote-that so my descriptions are likely to be pretty basic, but Arber brings to mind the word “warm” while Kistna is “fresh”.

(Incidentally, when I say “cheap bottles” I mean cheap; about £5 for a 100ml bottles which is a third of what you’d pay in a store, never mind being at least five or six times cheaper than designer brand fragrances)

Those were fine, but the supplies soon started drying up. Whether it’s because I happened to be looking at the right times (usually just after Christmas, when everyone was flogging their unwanted gift boxes) or because people began to realise that they were really nice scents is immaterial; I was resigned to paying £15 a bottle like everyone else.

And then something happened, which is pretty much the root of my current situation: my girlfriend bought me some scents. Namely, Paco Rabanne XS pour Homme and Carolina Herrera Chic for Men.

Now, XS pour Homme is a nice enough fragrance; it’s fresh, clean and reminds me vaguely of soap. But Chic for Men is in a different league; it’s another warm scent but there’s something about it that’s just… I can’t describe it. All I can say is that if I’m wearing it I’ll catch myself sniffing it off the back of my hand.

And so it began. I wouldn’t say I’ve become massively obsessed with buying fragrances, but I’ve certainly found myself spending a little bit too much of my free time researching the purchase of them; for example, I’ve compiled a spreadsheet listing the ones I’m most interested in and their prices at various websites. Already I’ve added to my arsenal the likes of Burberry Touch for Men (which I feel is best described by the words “violet” and “elusive”), Givenchy Very Irrésistible for Men (”chocolate” and “hazelnut”) and Davidoff Echo, the latter being a fragrance I tried and liked, but I’m already not as keen on it as I was; the fact that it puts me in mind of an orange-scented car air freshener is probably something to do with it.

Despite the fact that I’ve got better things to be spending my money on (a longer-overdue PC upgrade, for a start) I’m still looking at the next scent to buy; at present I’ve got my eye on Givency Xeryus Rouge and Estée Lauder Beyond Paradise for Men — which I’m not even sure if I like, but I’ve somehow managed to convince myself that if I buy a bottle and wear it every day I’ll slowly grow to love it. This probably isn’t the best attitude to take; if it takes a while to grow on me, how long is it going to take to grow on my friends and colleagues? Still, I’ve pushed logic and reason to one side in my fragrant quest.

Am I as obsessed as some? Definitely not; I don’t, for example, count the number of times I wear a particular scent. However the fact that I’m spending money that could be going on a new computer is something that would’ve been unthinkable twelve months ago. Perhaps it’s only a matter of time before I start noting down my fragrance habits…